Shawn doesn’t care about Orlando Bloom

Sunday, April 12, 2009 @ 2:06am by Shawn (Movies & Television)

Full Frame ended last Sunday. For most of the documentary film goers it ended with a late night re-screening of an award winning doc. For my self and Corey, it ended a bit differently…

Rewind to the day before. Corey, Kenneth and my self were heading to the corner sandwich shop and Kenneth got pulled away by a friend. Corey and I went on to eat. When Kenneth showed up he told us a story. Kenneth and friend were sitting in the hotel lobby when a man walks in with a dog. With surprise Kenneth said “What?” and his friend replied “Yeah, I know what’s with the dog??” “No, that is Orlando Bloom!” Kenneth corrected. After telling us this story I realized that same morning I was rushing to the box office because I didn’t want to miss out on films I wanted to see. As I came up the stairs, there was a dog tied to the railing. It was Orlando Bloom and his black lab…I walked right by.

From then on, there seemed to be a Bloom buzz about in our little town of Durham. Corey witnessed a gleeful young lad run up to a group. Gasping for breath and holding a stitch in his side exclaimed “I JUST SAW ORLANDO BLOOM!!” to a giggle of girls. Through out the festival I heard of all sorts of Orlando sightings. So much so, that on Sunday, before the award ceremony J. Scott and I were sitting in the lobby talking about the buzz. I began this rant about how if I was to in Orlando’s posse I would be his humility. I wouldn’t call him Orlando, I’d call him an ever changing varsity of American cities. The ultimate moment would be the one opportunity that Detroit (Orlando) would come up to us at a club. After elf dancing to Arcade Fire, he would be of need of a drink. His crew would abide and say “You can have my drink. “You can have my drink,” and I would burst out “AND MY AXE!!” Any rate, thinking nothing of this, J. Scott and I laughed about this and carried on the BBQ.

Now we come to the end of the festival. Corey and I had just saw an ok movie and were heading out for a bite. As we walked through the hotel I was regaled her with my Orlando Bloom story. We walk out side to the very spot that I passed by Bloom and dog. As we went out to the landing I said: “And Orlando Bloom was sitting right there and I didn’t fucking care.” As I said this, The black turtle necked clad man turned his head like a magical creature towards me.

It was Orlando Bloom.

Without missing a beat I rapped him on the back and said “And now you’re standing right here! Let me explain.” So I did, and he laughed. I asked him if he got to see any of the films, he said no, I asked him why he was in town, he said he was doing a “lil’ movie” (in a british accent, I forgot he was british). I said ok and just walked away.

As Corey and I went to IHOP, with a smirk of a memory that will never fade, she told me that she noticed his wispy facial hair moments before I said that I didn’t care about Orlando Bloom.